Reflections
by astareltheweeper
Summary: Sam and Jack's thoughts at the end of season 1...SJ


**Disclaimer:** I do not own Stargate and I don't make any money from this.

**A/N:** Okay so I still haven't achieved my dream of actually writing something with a storyline (I'm working on it I swear!) but this is at least a deviation from soppy romance fics... Just a little take on Sam and Jack's thoughts at the end of the first season and how their friendship may potentially have been at that time. For any extreme nitpickers: I know that the book I'm referring to could not possibly have been on Sam's college course, as it was only published in 2001, but it's one of my fave books and I just had to throw it in there since I am Sam in civilian form!

Sam was in one of her favourite places; curled up on the sofa in a big woolly sweater, reading a book. It was not her first time reading _Our Cosmic Habitat_ by Martin Rees; in fact the book was getting pretty dog eared by now. It had been one of the assigned texts during her first semester at college and she had grown to love it. She treasured it in the same way that other people treasured stories that they had read as a child. For Sam, this had been the book that truly opened up the universe to her. For years, she had longed to know the secrets that the universe held, and she would never forget the feeling that she had had when first reading this book; that she was somehow just that little bit closer to realising her dream. The theories in here were familiar to her; in fact she was pretty sure that she had several times proven physically what was only theoretical to Mr Rees. Sam smiled to herself. A lot had changed this past year.

She hadn't believed it at first when she had been granted permission to join SG-1. A chance to travel to other worlds; it was greater even than her life's dream to be an astronaut. She remembered the butterflies in her stomach that first day that she had walked into the briefing room. Sam was not easily intimidated, but the thought of having to prove herself all over again to a bunch of chauvinist AF guys was not a pleasing one. Sometimes Sam hated being 'the girl'. Even on a basic level, it led to locker room problems! Being the pretty girl didn't make it any easier. Sam wasn't vain but she saw the looks she got... During her first few weeks at the SGC, General Hammond had been the only one who consistently addressed her face when he was speaking to her.

But Sam adored her job. She loved being able to work alongside the men who had become her closest friends. Their experiences had drawn them together with a bond that resembled family. Repeatedly saving the world was no easy task but Daniel's enthusiasm and Teal'c's attempts to adjust to human culture just made any day easier. And then there was Jack...

Sam chewed absent mindedly on the sleeve of her sweater and blushed slightly. Okay, so if she admitted it, Jack did more than make her day easier. She felt her heart skip a beat when he looked at her. She laughed like a schoolgirl at his jokes... Yes, it was foolish to have a crush on her CO, but Sam just couldn't help it. There was something about Jack that she was deeply attracted to... She didn't know why, because they were total opposites in every way possible but...

Sam suddenly realised the time and jumped off the sofa. Casting about frantically for a bookmark, she despaired of finding one and left the book open but upturned on her coffee table. The mug of coffee that had been sitting there for over a half hour came to her attention. _Damn, what a waste..._

Sam carried the cold mug into the kitchen and placed it on the counter by the microwave. Slipping on her shoes, she shuffled outside into the crisp cold night air.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jack frowned at the episode of The Simpsons that he was watching. He was pretty sure that he had seen this one before. _Yup..._ he thought, as Homer fell down the stairs. Jack couldn't help but feel that the show had really lost its touch this past year. Then again, he hardly got the chance to watch it at all anymore. He spent a lot of nights off world these days. But going back to the SGC had been the best thing he had ever done.

Jack had been blaming himself for Charlie's death for a whole year. He had refused to forgive himself, refused to move on. Truth be told, Jack would never forgive himself.

He took another sip of his beer, sighed, and got up to look out the window. Life at the SGC had helped him to move on from that. Jack still had something to contribute to the world, and dying an early death alone in his house would not have helped anyone. He loved going on missions. He could completely forget about the real world that awaited him at home and focus entirely on the moment. SG-1 meant everything to Jack and he would gladly lay his life down for any one of them.

Sure, the science side of things didn't really interest him. It didn't go completely over his head, as everyone thought, but Jack preferred to let them think that. He didn't want to get drawn into any intellectual banter, thank you very much. It was true, he did hate scientists. Well, except for one maybe.

Jack couldn't help the traces of a smile drawing at the corners of his lips as he thought of her. Carter. Jack had known from very early on that this was one special woman. They had understood each other from the start. Jack never needed to tell her anything twice, sometimes he didn't even need to tell her once; she just knew. Jack enjoyed working with her. She combined her scientific knowledge with the good wholesome common sense of the AF in a way that Daniel never could...

He had heard the snide comments in the locker room about their relationship. As much as Jack enjoyed a good joke, he had had to crush that speculation. Of course Carter was attractive, you'd need to be blind not to see it –a fact that the guys in the locker room were clearly aware of- but Jack did his best not to look at her that way. Frat regs aside, things with Sarah were still... messy.

He drained his beer bottle and looked at his watch. Glancing outside he judged that the time was about right. He picked up the phone and dialled. It was about a minute before a rather breathless voice answered.

"Sam here."

"Hey Carter. You ready?"

"Yes Sir, I've got it all set up outside."

"Good stuff. Remember to set the co-ordinates into the telescope, it's a pretty high mag."

"Way ahead of you Sir."

"Okay genius, I get it. You can handle this by yourself. Enjoy the show and let me know if you get any good pictures!"

"Will do Sir. See you tomorrow."

"Later Carter."

Sam set down the phone and went back outside. She adjusted the telescope that Jack had lent her and looked up at the sky, her breath forming an icy cloud in the cold night air. She felt excited. Her love of astronomy was something that she had never been able to share with many people in her life, and she had never been able to afford a telescope like this.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Jack climbed onto his roof and checked to see that his telescope was ready. He settled himself into the chair and looked through the viewer, getting the camera ready to take some pictures. He was gonna beat Carter on their little bet. He only felt marginally guilty about keeping the better camera for himself. As he watched, the comet came into view, its beautiful icy tail streaking across the sky. _Yup,_ he thought _life is good..._


End file.
